I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Randomize
