careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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