I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
