I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
