Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
