I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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