I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I licked your asshole in confidence.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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