but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
