she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
