I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
