Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
