Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
