Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
