Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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