Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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