Im at strip club and am horny
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
