so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Randomize
