Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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