The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
