He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Randomize
