There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Randomize
