We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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