big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
