I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Found your dick twin last night
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
