Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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