clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
