Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
