I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
