so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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