i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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