..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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