Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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