I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
