He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize