Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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