i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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