i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
