don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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