why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
