i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
