It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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