just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
