I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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