i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
