That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
