I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
