on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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