Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
