READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
