wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize